If you talk about the negatives, everyone says “don’t fret, you’ll miss this one day.” If you talk about the positives, you are envied for “having it all together.” I’ve been on the receiving and giving end of both of these extremes and I just don’t think either is 100% right all of the time.
Being in the trenches of having littles (and hoping to add a few more to our brood before we’re done!), there are some days I am so happy with our little family, and enjoy most of my time with my kiddos. I look at them, and see their tiny faces, and I am amazed at God’s creativity and power. I want to soak up every minute and preserve all of these precious hugs and chubby baby legs.
Then there are other days when parenting is just plain HARD. So hard that some mornings I don’t feel like being a mom. I don’t feel like I have the strength to get through yet another long day of diaper changes (x2 – which will change soon due to potty training and will be a new challenge in itself!), feedings, toddler messes, and disciplining. I know it will be over one day, I know it won’t always be this way or be this draining. But for now, it’s exhausting.
So please hear this, dear mommas…it’s alright to have good days, and it’s alright to have bad ones.
Just because you have a bad day doesn’t mean you have to ignore how you feel because it’ll all be over one day, it means you had a bad day and tomorrow can be a better one.
Just because you are in an awesome season in life doesn’t mean you shouldn’t talk about it to your friends that are struggling, it means you can share with them about a season of hardship you’ve experienced too.
Just because you don’t feel like being a mom right now doesn’t mean you are a bad one, it just means you need a break, and that’s normal, and it’s okay. Text a friend or get a sitter. Do what you have to do to be healthy.
Just because your friend is posting adorable pictures of her kids who look like they’re behaving perfectly, doesn’t mean yours never do. Flip through that phone of yours, you know you have some too.
Just because someone sees a struggle as easy, doesn’t mean you have to feel the same way. It just means you have different struggles.
Being a mom that is real means being okay with the good and the bad. We all experience it, we all struggle at times and we all have our strong moments. Often, things that are hard seem so much easier when time gets in between it and us, but we have to have the bad to appreciate the good.
I hope that others don’t view me as being negative all the time, or overly positive. I hope they see me as REAL, with a good balance of both because I want to be someone who can speak the truth without fogging up the rose-colored glasses for new moms. Someone that can say, “yes, one day it will be easier, but it’s okay that it’s hard right now” and someone that can ask a mom friend, “what would help you today?”
We’re all in this together girl friends. Let’s all be REAL moms and support each other. That’s what we’re all looking for anyway.